


What's Gonna Happen

by AnnaOkegom



Series: Scythia Sings [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: BABY GIRL SCYTHIA SWEARS TOO--, Comedy, Dark Comedy, F/M, Humor, Songfic, Swearing, What's Gonna Happen, i guess she is a lot of things, scythia is paranoid, scythia sings, she is also crazy, shitpost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2019-11-15
Packaged: 2021-01-31 07:47:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21442711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaOkegom/pseuds/AnnaOkegom
Summary: Scythia is nervous about Fuyuki's parents coming to visit, so she decides to just let all her feelings out already.
Relationships: Scythia/Fuyuki Chiba
Series: Scythia Sings [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1576972





	What's Gonna Happen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AbsoluteSpoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AbsoluteSpoon/gifts).

> When I saw the videos of Spinel singing "What's Gonna Happen", I immediately fell in love XD  
And today I realized that it fits Scythia a lot too, mainly because of the extremely nervous and pessimistic visions and self-esteem issues. And also the voice. So I decided to do this. I HOPE YOU ENJOY AND I CAN MAKE YOU LAUGH AS MUCH AS I DID WHILE WRITING THIS XD  
(i didn't even draft this, so there may be spelling errors. i'm not gonna correct anything because i'm sure this would be even funnier with mistakes. thanks)

Scythia stared at herself in the mirror in front of her. The cracks under her eyes were practically invisible now, hidden by the ridiculous amount of makeup she had thrown on them; the makeup she had stolen from Minori. Her original plan was to return it right after using, but when she realized that she had used everything, she just decided to throw it on the trash. Minori probably wouldn't mind, anyway, and if she did, Scythia didn't give a damn. 

She was all alone in her room, and she hated being alone more than anything. Because whenever she was by herself, it meant there was nobody else with her, and nobody else being there with her meant that there was nothing to do, and there being nothing to do meant that she wasn't doing anything; and whenever Scythia wasn't doing anything, she couldn't stop thinking and dwelling on the past. When she used to be Ketsume's friend and play with him and annoy him 24/7. That was fun. Then when Ketsume left her in the middle of the train tracks to die. That wasn't fun. And when she went nuts and isolated herself for 13 years to create every deadly weapon she could think of, ending up with a bomb she planned to put on his base to kill everyone there and herself. That wasn't fun either. But then she met Fuyuki and he stopped her, giving her a new sense of hope in humanity, which was fun and sad at the same time.

As of now, she was just a hand-made puppet, a mannequin, an object, brought to life through non-recommendable methods that Ketsume decided to use. And even him didn't like her, because of how annoying and "primitive" she was. But I mean, what the hell did he expect from the first model ever? Yeah, she creaked a lot when she moved, and even though that was literally unbearable, he had no right to throw her away. He could have at least left her on a pizzeria or something. Even though she didn't like eating because she had no digestive system, she would have appreciated the gesture. And even though she abhorred Ketsume with every ounce of her soul and there were times (about 943 times a day) were everything she wanted was to blow up the universe and watch it burn as she herself burned alongside it, Scythia was positive she was making lots of progress.

The only memory she had from her human life was that she was an innocent 17-years old girl who had contracted the Red Plague and spent the last month of her life agonizing and suffering before literally choking on her own coughed blood and dying. But Fuyuki had been teaching many things about human life, and even though Scythia didn't understand certain things (like why she couldn't beat up some people), she always listened to him. Everything was fine.

Everything was fine.

Everything would be fine, if Fuyuki's parents weren't coming to visit them and she was forced to talk to them and appear normal. Scythia wanted to die. The only reason she didn't start banging her head against the mirror in front of her was because she was positive that, if she started, this time it would definitely kill her. But it was tempting, oh, it was. Fuyuki's parents would hate her, she knew it, she hadn't even met them and nothing had happened yet, but she knew what was gonna happen.

Scythia got up from the stool she was sitting at and walked out of the room, looking fine, but actually dead inside. As she entered the living room, she saw Fuyuki and Minori sitting on the couch together, talking, and bit her lip so she wouldn't strangle Minori to death.

"Scythia, there you are!" Fuyuki greeted her, and both him and Minori stood up, smiling. "Is everything alright?"

Scythia looked at them. Both of them. She just kept staring at them, biting her lip and twisting her fingers for about 5 literal minutes.

"No," she finally answered, honestly. It was the first truthful response she had said that day. It also happened to be the first thing she had said that day. "Nothing is alright. Nothing is ever alright!"

"What happened?" Fuyuki asked.

Scythia inhaled a lot of air into her nonexistent lungs and exhaled it all. Finally, it had come. Her time to shine on the spotlight.

"_I know what's gonna happen,_" Scythai started to sing, not even thinking, with panic on her voice. "_I'll try to go to bed, with fear of failure flapping like a fruit bat on my head!_"

Fuyuki and Minori looked at her in confusion, before looking at each other's eyes. Where was that instrumental coming from?

"_I'll sleep for half an hour, the clock will ring at six,_" she continued, with her hand on her chest. "_I'll wake up in the shower with a (nonexistent) stomach full of bricks! So I won't have any breakfast, maybe just a little tea! Like when you have to go and get a colonoscopy!_"

"Wait, how do you know what a colonoscopy is--"

"_Which incidentally isn't half as disconcerting or upsetting as going for a part you know there is no way that you are getting!_" Scythia took a firm hold of her pigtails and closed her eyes, ignoring what Fuyuki had just said; how she knew these things was her secret. "B_ut anyway I'm heading downSTAIRS for the 'audition', where everything I'm dreading will be coming to fruition, and here's what's gonna happen!_"

She ran over to them until she was so close all their noses were almost touching, and Minori was so startled by this she fell backwards.

"_I'll walk in weak with hunger, and there's a dozen girls who look like me but ten years younger!_" She roared at Fuyuki's face with anger. There were, indeed, too much girls (and overall people) on that house, and Scythia felt at the same time lonely and suffocated. "_I'll go into the bathroom, and I'll try to vocalize, and I'll be singing memamemamema, but I'll be hearing 'Scythia sucks, she really, really, really blows, and she's old, and she's lame'!_"

Finally Scythia jumped backwards, now beginning to walk in circles around the room with her hands behind her back.

"_And then someone calls my name, and here's what happens! I'll walk into the room, the gross fluorescent lightning is inviting as a tomb!_" she yelled, pointing at Fuyuki's poor choice of lamps and wallpaper. God fricking damn it Fuyuki. "_And everybody smiles, they'll say its good to see ya, but all I see is judges, and they'll all look like Ketsume! And then a little banter as they look me up and down,_" She scanned her own body with her hand until she touched the floor.

"Wait a minute... where are the cracks on your face?!" Minori screamed, and instantly regretted not locking her makeup on a safe.

"_And somewhere through the fog of insecurity and hate, I'll try to convince them that I'm charming, and I'm clever and I'm fun to have around! But I'm starting to unravel, in my head I hear the gavel!_" Scythia ran towards the table, and Fuyuki and Minori instinctively put their hands on their ears. "_Guilty! __They're gonna throw the book at me 'cause I'm __guilty! __Of coming in and wasting all their time! __Guilty! __Of almost every other showless crime! __Not young enough! __Not thin enough! __Not pretty enough! __Not GOOD enough!_" She slammed her hand against the table with every word, almost breaking the table and her hand.

Fuyuki and Minori took their hands off their ears, terrified to see what was coming next.

"'We hereby sentence you to a lifetime of waiting tables and debilitating self-loathing!'" Scythia stopped singing to say normally, the music suddenly stopping.

"...Scythia?" Fuyuki dared to call, with the softest tone he managed to create.

"_But wait no someone's asking 'So can we hear your voice?', I make a lame attempt at humor: Do I have a choice?_" Scythia ignored him and started singing again, and the magic instrumental music restarted. "_I nod at the pianist, he's always wearing black, he's always in a turtleneck with dandruff on his back! No sooner do I get my note, and open up my trap, Then inevitably some mealy-mouthed assistant director's, thumbs are all over his iPhone, and I know he's probably tweeting 'LOL, This girl is crap, she's a fake, she's a phony, she could never win a Tony'!_"

Scythia fell on her knees, with a comically pained expression on her face, her arms scattered around like noodles in front of her body.

"_And now I'm in a place I know quite well, I've left the world and I've entered hell, I'm this far away from a fainting spell!_" She slapped the floor. "_But just before I die, I finish a song which I oversell, somebody says thanks and wishes me well. The next thing I know I'm at Tacobell, stuffing my face with meat!_"

Scythia then jumped up, with the sanest face Fuyuki ever saw her have, and inhales more air into her nonexistent lungs, her eyes gently closed. After exhaling, she opened her eyes and looked at them calmly, and the music matched her (external) emotions.

"I'm trying to take it slowly, I'm trying to be my best. I'm trying to be more holy, less bitter and depressed. I'm reading Eckhart Tolle, he makes a lot of sense! I bought a Buddhist bowl, he says he it helps you be less tense." she sang very calmly, beaming.

Fuyuki turned his gaze to Minori, who nodded and pointed at Scythia with her head. Slowly, he began approaching her, but fell backwards as soon as her tranquil appearance fell apart and her panicked one took over.

"_IT DOESN'T DO A THING FOR ME! I sit there on the floor, I watch a vivid sequence of humiliating instances from my past go by and think what kind of masochist keeps coming back for more?!_" she cried, seeming more hysterical than before if that was possible. "_But you know what's gonna happen, 'cuz it never doesn't happen, it's gonna always--_"

"Scythia!" Fuyuki called from the floor, more firmly than before.

"_\--always--_"

"SCYTHIA!" he screamed, sick of this song.

"FUYUKI?!" she screamed back, as though she had forgotten he was there. "_No! I know what's gonna happen, don't tell me that I don't, I know I say I'll rise up to the occasion but I won't!_" she continued, the music becoming more erratic and fast, following her voice tone. "_And don't say I've got talent, and don't say I've got heart, and don't say that I'm clever, 'cuz I know I'm pretty smart! I'm smart enough to know that I'm too stupid to admit, you can't survive a diet that consists of eating SHIT!_" ("WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT?!" Fuyuki shrieked.) "_The trick is knowing when it's time to pack your bags, and say 'That's it!_'"

There was a little pause, as Scythia stared at Fuyuki and Minori who stood next to each other and in front of her, and Fuyuki and Minori stared at Scythia. Scythia then pointed at them.

"_You know what's gonna happen, I know what's gonna happen, here's what's gonna happen--_"

She was interrupted by knocks on the door.

"Honey, we're here!" Fuyuki's parents said from behind the door, happily.

Scythia looked at the window behind her, then back at Fuyuki and Minori, then at the door, then back at Fuyuki and Minori, and finally smiled.

"_I quit! I QUIT!_" she started singing, as she turned around and ran towards the window. She then jumped, ready to dive headfirst outside; but the window was closed, and glass flew everywhere as Scythia fell down from the 80-story building. "_I QUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!_"

Some seconds later, there was a loud thud, and nothing else.

"I bet her face's got twice more cracks after this," Minori whispered quietly to herself.

**Author's Note:**

> press F to pay respects for Scythia  
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End file.
